In the past month, I’ve joined okcupid in order to cease and desist the discussion of my love life but so far have had little luck. I admit that that is due, in large part, to my laissez-faire attitude about the process in general. See, I enjoy being single. I enjoy doing my own thing and not answering to anyone. At the same time, I miss that feeling of being cared for and cuddling. I also miss sex. A lot. It’s also difficult to be one of the only singletons among your friends. The pity gets old after a while.
Basically, I have had one romantic relationship in my life (almost four years) and have limited dating experience. Now I live in NYC and work in the art world. That means that I meet a lot of artists/assholes, gay men, and women. And I’m 5’9”, so most men are too short for me (yes, I have a height minimum, judge away.) Pickins’ are slim. When I go out to bars, I attract old men (as in they qualify for AARP,) arrogant assholes, and really short men. Again, not interested.
So, seeing as I haven’t dated anyone in over four years, I have many friends who are advocating casual sex, but I just can’t do it. I believe in it. I think it’s awesome, but I’m just not built that tway. First of all, I need to be comfortable with someone before I can relax enough to enjoy myself. Also, once I sleep with someone, I want more with them. I choose to blame my hormones. So what do you do? Apparently you join a dating site. I’ve been told by my friend who did her research that people she has encountered on eHarmony and Match are very long-term relationship and marriage centric, and since that’s not what I’m looking for at this point (and I’m poor,) I’m sticking with okcupid. Last night, a different friend yelled at me for my lack of effort in the whole thing, so she has challenged me to message three people three times a week.
We shall see how it goes…